That moment when something happens that shakes your foundation so hard it takes awhile to regain your balance…

That is where I sit now; “In Limbo” I would like to call it because it feels like a space where I am “caught up” …but also like a really bad dance.

 

My mom died.

I am about to turn 40.

My son is about to be a senior in high school.

I am about to turn 40.

My mom died.

 

MY mom… died.

 

I just keep coming back to that one because it doesn’t seem real.

I think more than any of the others, that one has me dancing this crazy dance and feeling caught between two worlds.

She was here and doing great, then she was sick, and then she was gone…in three short months.

Now, I’m floating in this space of mom’s stuff and dad’s loneliness and my own grief.

There is a gaping hole in the world where she once stood.

I am “In Limbo” between the world with her and the world without her…I’m learning the steps to a dance I don’t even like.